At last!

Somewhere on the east coast, David Letterman is smiling:

More than a decade after 16-year-old Amy Fisher had a sexual relationship with a much-older car mechanic and shot his wife in the face, the one-time "Long Island Lolita" and Joey and Mary Jo Buttafuoco have agreed to appear together in a televised reunion...

"It's time to just put it behind us," Fisher, now 31, told the newspaper. "We played this all out in a public eye. It'd be interesting to let the public see the healing process at the end. They saw everything else _ why not let them see the final product?"

Ah, yes, because nothing quite says "let's get this whole media circus behind us once and for all" like a teevee special. And I'm sure most people will really be tuning in to find out about the "healing process," and not at all to rehash the lurid details of the whole thing. Right, Joey?

"There's going to be a lot of shocking revelations, and that's why I'm excited to sit down to do this," he said.

There's that legendary Joey Buttafuoco class for you.

Anyway, there may be hope for us yet, since the program has not yet found a network buyer. I mean, what are the odds that one of our fine networks will pick up something so unbelievably crass?

Oh, crap.