P.T. Barnum: Architect of Middle East Terror

PETA's president almost started making sense at a recent conference in the Middle East:

Ingrid E. Newkirk said last Thursday at the International Nonviolence Conference in Bethlehem, “we call all attacks on civilians, whether against Palestinians in Jenin or Israelis in Tel Aviv, what they are: War crimes.”

Well, the Jenin thing that she mentions was actually a hoax, but let's give Ingrid credit for not coming right out of the gate with any lunacy about animals.

"If we want an end to violence, it means that we must first reject the slaughterhouse, the animal circus, and animal skins and remember that kindness to animals has been a cornerstone of every great religion in the history of the world," she added.

Oh. Well, that didn't take long.

You know, I'm all for an end to violence, and I think cruelty to animals for the sake of cruelty is terrible, but I don't think the first step on the road to an end to all war is the shuttering of slaughterhouses and the big top. In fact, I'm pretty sure tasty hamburgers and a visit to the circus are among a long list of things that have probably never started a war.

Anyway, I return you to the utter insanity:

"War is a frightening thing for all living beings. Every day, millions of animals, who pledge allegiance to no flag, and who have done nothing to provoke aggression, are the victims of the longest running undeclared war in human history: the war on the animal nations," Newkirk added.

Uh-huh.

In related news, the ambassador for the shrimp I just ate for lunch committed a war crime against was unavailable for comment.

Read the rest of the article for some more assorted chuckles, including the part where she says, "According to every biblical scholar, nonviolence and vegetarianism are God’s ideal." Which is why, if you think back to Sunday school, you'll remember God asking for so many sacrifices of soy-based animal substitutes.

(Newkirk craziness via Ace/Allah.)