Headline of the day

Hunt called off for drug lord's hippo:

Colombia has called off the hunt to kill a drug lord's escaped hippo and will instead try to relocate the beast after its mate was shot dead by order of the government, sparking outrage from animal rights groups.

The late Pablo Escobar apparently made enough money by exporting blow to musicians, New York City yuppie douches, and Robin Williams back in the eighties that he could afford his own zoo, from which two hippos escaped back in 2006. They've been living in the wild ever since. Well, except for the one who recently got gunned down. He's not really living anywhere anymore.