Friends don't let friends do any of this shit

This isn't funny when it happens to you. But when it happens to someone else and they get punished for it? Comedy gold...

A Colorado man who claimed he was trying to defend himself from a mugger when he shot himself in the groin has been convicted of illegal discharge of a firearm. Investigators said there was no evidence to substantiate David Leroy Blurton's self-defense claim and jurors convicted the 50-year-old on Wednesday. The shooting happened at the parking lot of a grocery store in Dillon, Colo., on May 2009.

Wait for it...wait for it...

Prosecutors say Blurton had been drinking.

But of course he had. I'm just surprised that there was no crystal meth involved.