Pure logic

Seriously, Mr. Spock would be proud of these two geniuses:

It was the annual "Shop With a Cop" back-to-school event, with officers helping about 160 children pick out clothing and school supplies for the approaching school year.

But that didn't stop two men from going aisle to aisle, picking out a few items of their own.

While officers were helping out the kids, store security alerted the police they had their eyes on two young men packing their own backpacks with merchandise.

"Two guys came in and were picking through goods, cutting tags off and loading up their backpacks with blenders, shoes, clothes and tools," said Sgt. Pete Simpson, police spokesman.

[...]

The two young men stopped, Shane Alexander, 20, of Hillsboro, and Jason Vantress, 30, of Southeast Portland, were arrested and walked back to the store's security office in handcuffs.

"Initially, they said they were freaked out by all the cops there," Simpson said. "But then, they thought it would be a good time to steal, that police would be distracted."

I love the thinking (or lack thereof) that went into this heist...

Alexander: "Dude, there are a bunch of cops here. I'm having second thoughts about this."

Vantress: "I know, but they're totally not paying attention to us. They're looking after all these kids!"

Alexander: "Okay, so let's go forward with our plan to steal a bunch of stuff which, regardless of the fact that there are tons of cops here, totally disregards the fact that the store has a security staff."

Vantress: "LET'S DO THIS!!!"

Alexander: "IT'S TOTALLY THE PERFECT CRIME!!!"