Grand theft blotto

Getting trashed and driving is never a good idea, but this dumbass took it to a whole new level:

A North Pole man was surprised when police accused him of stealing a car from a gentleman club in Fairbanks. The man, 27, explained to officers that he was in his Chevy Cavalier. The only problem, police said, was that he was behind the wheel of a Ford Escort.

Police charged the man with auto theft, felony driving under the influence and misdemeanor drugs misconduct Police said his blood-alcohol content was .166, more than twice the legal limit.

Now, I've been known to have a few, mostly on the weekend or after a devastating election night landslide (see below), but I've never gotten blitzed enough to inadvertently swipe someone else's car. My neighbors will vouch for the fact that I stick to the occasional accidental home burglary.