Friday, December 30, 2011

Nobody likes this on Facebook

The internet has done a lot to simplify our lives. We have information, shopping, and filthy, filthy pornography right at our fingertips. It's also made it much easier to identify the criminally stupid:
The Coconino County Sheriff's Office said Frankie Almuina, 20, and Kayla Almuina, 19, of Ash Fork, were arrested after someone saw the pictures of their children, ages 2 and 10 months, on Facebook and reported them to a child abuse hotline, The (Flagstaff) Arizona Daily Sun reported Friday.

Deputies said the pictures depicted the children with their wrists, ankles and mouths bound with duct tape, and one of the pictures depicted a child hung upside down from an exercise machine.
I simply don't understand the way this unfolded. First, these geniuses decided to duct tape their kids to some fitness equipment, which is not a bright idea. Then, they thought to photograph what they had done, creating evidence of the fact that they had taken that questionable first step. Finally, at least one of them figured it would be a good idea/funny/somehow the slightest bit okay to show these photographs to other people online.

Sunday, December 25, 2011

Merry Christmas, everybody!

I hope everyone got to spend some time with friends and family today like I did, and I hope Santa brought you all something nice. As for the true meaning of Christmas, well, I don't think anybody does a better job of explaining it than Linus:

Monday, December 19, 2011

Getting greedy

We've all dabbled in a little harmless welfare fraud here and there, but come on, guy:
A former Greek policeman who invented 19 fictional offspring to claim benefits for what would have been the largest family in Greece has been arrested for benefit fraud, police said.

The former police officer, divorced and with no children of his own, quit his 1,000-euro-a-month ($1,300) job in 2001 and has been living solely on benefits ever since, police said on Thursday.

Using photographs of children he found online, the 54-year-old man forged birth certificates and other documents needed to claim benefits for at least one child a year since 1996.

Police estimate he made at least 150,000 euros in claims over 15 years, but the actual amount is probably much higher.
On the one hand, you can fault the guy for thinking he could get away with gaming the system by completely making up the largest family in the country. On the other hand, you can't really fault him for that, seeing as how the authorities never really seemed to notice his gigantic fake family (or his gigantic brass balls) until he had already suckered them out of a bunch of money for a decade and a half.

Saturday, December 10, 2011

Looking good!

The Angels made it official today, introducing Albert Pujols at a press conference at the Big A.

Normally, I don't get excited about off season goings-on in baseball, but then again, the Angels don't normally shock the sports world by signing the most sought-after free agent on the market.  And with the addition of C.J. Wilson, we've got what may be the best starting rotation in the AL.

Spring Training can't get here fast enough.

Thursday, December 08, 2011

I heart

I've been using Amazon Prime for just about all of my Chrimmas shopping for the last couple of years, and it's perfect for someone like me who procrastinates like crazy and hates going to the mall (or, really, any stores) at this time of year.  Just about anything I order shows up within two days, and I don't pay for shipping.  Awesome.

I ordered something the other day without checking first to see whether or not the person I was going to give it to already had it, and you can see where that's going.  I tried to cancel my order, but since they send stuff out at warp speed, they told me that wouldn't work and instead directed me to their returns page.  I'd be able to print out a shipping label and send it back at no cost, so that would be fine.

Now, here's where it gets really cool.  When I clicked through, intending to print out the label, they told me that I could just keep the item and they would refund my money.  How cool is that?

If the mall wasn't already dead to me, it certainly would be as of now.

Thursday, December 01, 2011

What do they do on Halloween?

So, some guy down in North Carolina wanted to spread a little Christmas cheer, but he apparently decided to do so in the wussiest town in the South:
Jeffery Acker, who donned the top section of an inflatable snowman Sunday and strolled through downtown Vanceboro while carrying a 4-foot candy cane, said his walk was meant to be inspire holiday spirit, not fear, WCTI-TV, New Bern, N.C., reported Thursday.


Acker is not accused of any illegal activities and Police Chief William Turner, whose department received four 911 calls about a man in a scary costume, said he has "more important" things to investigate.
The chief then cut the interview short and sped off to the scene of an alleged spider in someone's bathtub.