Violent video games are good for you

It's science! And you can't argue with science (they had a study about that, too):

Violent video games like "Call of Duty" can help trigger-happy players make decisions faster in real life, according to a study released on Wednesday.

Researchers from New York's University of Rochester found that first-person shooter games produced a heightened sensitivity and led to more efficient use of sensory evidence.

That's right, parents, if you want your kid to grow up to be president (or maybe even something respectable) you should buy them video games where they slaughter their enemies by the hundreds using machine guns, grenades, and rocket launchers.

(You can't say I never did anything for you, kids.)